Overcoming Age Barriers in Leadership: Tips for Young Leaders

I started my leadership journey when I was eighteen.

Practically everyone I was responsible for leading at that time was much older than I was, and usually, they were also more experienced.

It was confusing, frustrating, and even awkward at times to be the leader in that kind of context.

There were days I experienced crippling insecurity about my age and lack of experience.

I had full-on imposter syndrome.

But I was able to, more or less, overcome this challenge.

I’m now in a different season of leadership, and I don’t have the same struggles today.

However, I will never forget how hard that season of emerging leadership was.

My heart goes out to you if you’re experiencing this right now.

It’s a challenging position to be in, and I would like to offer you some thoughts today that I hope will serve you.

Over the last fifteen years, since I first started, I've observed seven foundational principles that have proven to be highly effective for overcoming age barriers in leadership.

Some of these principles I’ve stumbled across myself, and others I’ve observed and learned from others in leadership.

Some of these principles I learned from my successes, and others I learned from my mistakes.

In any case, these seven principles, in my mind, are the key to overcoming age barriers in leadership.

Let’s dive in.

Here’s the first principle for overcoming age barriers…

#1 ANCHOR YOUR LEADERSHIP TO MISSION, VISION, AND VALUES

I’m assuming that your business or organization has some sort of mission statement, vision for the future, or values that you collectively operate by.

If not, well, that’s a problem for another episode.

But if you’re a leader, particularly a young leader, it’s absolutely imperative that you anchor your leadership to the Mission, Vision, and Values.

Why?

Because they provide authority, credibility, and depth to your leadership in a way that supersedes a lack of age, experience, or tenure.

Mission, Vision, and Values, assuming they’re good, stand the test of time.

They rise above generational divides and transitions.

They act as a powerful governing force that aligns the organization and drives the collective body of individuals forward in unity.

When you anchor your leadership in mission, vision, and values, the “why” behind your decision-making is not driven by you or your personal opinion, but by the collective pursuit of the organization’s mission, vision, and values.

That’s powerful.

This is important for any leader, but it’s especially important if you’re young and inexperienced.

A lot of young leaders, including myself growing up, feel like they need to prove themselves, act like they have all the answers, or even put up a fake front of confidence.

This doesn’t work.

It creates all sorts of issues, and it doesn’t ultimately encourage collective buy-in from the team you lead.

Please don’t go this route.

Instead, all you need to do is internalize the mission, vision, and values that drive your organization forward and lead people toward THAT.

Anchoring your leadership to that is what ultimately brings authority, credibility, and depth to your leadership.

That’s first.

Second.

#2 SHOW RESPECT BEFORE YOU EVER EXPECT TO RECEIVE ANY

I remember there was a team member that I was really struggling with early on.

He was about twenty years older than me.

He had more experience than I did at the time.

But I was in the leadership position.

The first time I worked with this guy, I could tell he had zero respect for me.

Looking back, it’s clear to me now that there was an ego issue, but at the same time, I was super young and inexperienced, and I understood even then why he didn’t respect me yet.

I struggled for months with this guy.

He had an attitude toward me; he questioned my decisions constantly and made it clear he didn’t trust my judgment.

It was miserable.

And worse, the rest of my team at the time started picking up on it.

Eventually, it became evident to me that I needed to do something about this guy.

I can’t let this continue.

So, I decided to go to him directly and talk through the issue.

I knew that I needed to try a different strategy.

I remember I went to him privately one day, and I said, “Hey, I just want you to know that I really value and respect your ideas and experience. I just wanted to ask you if you have any ideas or feedback that might help the team or help me as I strive to grow in my leadership. I really care about this team and I want to lead it well. Your input would mean a lot to me.”

I kid you not, this guy turned into a different person.

We talked for an hour.

He offered some great advice that I found helpful and eventually implemented.

I was able to talk to him about how I sensed that some negativity was bringing our team down and that I needed his support.

He got super vulnerable about his own insecurities and apologized for some of his behavior.

He was supportive. He was encouraging.

By the end of that meeting, he was thanking me!

From that day on, he showed me the utmost respect as the leader.

I learned a powerful lesson through that experience: You have to show respect before you ever expect to receive any.

The guy who used to be a nightmare for me turned out to be a delight.

He just needed to feel respected.

Okay, number three.

#3 BE THE MOST PASSIONATE PERSON IN THE ROOM

Passion is interesting.

There are a lot of definitions out there.

But here’s what I mean by passion.

I view passion as deeply and intensely caring about something.

So, when I say “be the most passionate person in the room,” I really mean be the person who cares the most.

When you bring that kind of passion, people can’t help but listen.

Passion arrests the attention of everyone in the room.

People feel it. People are moved by it.

People respect it.

Again, it doesn’t matter what your age, experience, or tenure is… People are willing to follow passionate people.

Because they intuitively know how deeply you care.

Now, here’s the catch… You can’t fake passion.

You’re either passionate about something or you’re not.

So, if you’re not feeling passionate at the moment, then you need to start there and discover why.

What is it that you can get passionate about?

Find that, and start there.

Number four.

#4 SHOW UP EARLY AND BE THE LAST ONE TO LEAVE

This seems so simple, and yet it’s so often ignored.

Earlier this year, we brought on a temporary intern.

I started noticing that this guy was regularly showing up early and even offering to stay late when he sensed a need.

You know what this communicated to me?

That this was more than just a job to him.

That he was willing to go the extra mile.

It communicated that he cared.

It also gave me confidence in his leadership capability.

He has since been promoted from an intern to a full staff member.

If you’re young and untested, there’s practically no better way to gain recognition and respect as a leader than to show up early and be the last one to leave.

It communicates so much to the people around you.

It can also be equally detrimental to your leadership, particularly if you're young, to do the opposite.

If you show up consistently late or if you’re rushing out the door as soon as you can, you’re communicating that you don’t care, that you’re not willing to go the extra mile, and people will have a hard time putting their confidence in you.

This is certainly not the same as having a healthy work/life balance.

That’s an entirely different issue.

We’re talking about having a spirit that is willing to take the hill with you’re fellow soldiers when need arises.

That’s very different than just clocking in and clocking out.

If you’re willing to go above and beyond expectations, it builds trust.

And leadership is built on trust.

Okay, number five.

#5 SHUT UP AND LISTEN

Have you ever said something in a meeting that you feel like was really dumb?

Maybe you responded to something too soon before you even had a chance to think about it, and then what you end up saying just sounds unprofessional or foolish?

We’ve all done this.

If you’re a younger leader, you might think that you need to talk more to be noticed or respected, but it’s actually the opposite.

I struggled with this a lot in my early years until I read some really valuable advice that changed the game for me.

It’s actually in the Bible in the book of James.

It says, “Be quick to listen, slow to speak.”

It changed my life (lol).

Seriously, it’s so simple yet so powerful.

When I’m in a conversation or a meeting, I try to practice the discipline of listening before I speak.

And yes, it is a discipline.

It’s incredible how hard it can be to just shut up and listen.

What I try to do is defer the conversation as long as I can to let the other person (or people) talk.

I’ll usually ask questions to get more of their thoughts out on the table.

Meanwhile, I just listen.

I’m not trying to formulate what I’m going to say yet.

I’m just trying to take in all of the information, all of the emotions, all of their context.

Once I’ve done this, I’ve found that whatever my response might be is ALWAYS stronger, wiser, and more empathetic than what I would have said if I had just spoken right out of the gates.

Without fail.

All I have to do is shut up and listen.

It’s such a simple yet powerful way to be a leader who regularly speaks with wisdom beyond your years.

Moving on to number six.

#6 DO YOUR RESEARCH

You may be young and inexperienced, but it’s hard to argue with solid research.

I’ve noticed a pretty obvious correlation in my own experience between time spent in research and quality of leadership.

The better my research, the better my leadership.

Also, there are few things more impressive than when one of my team members comes to me with solid research on a particular topic or decision.

It gives me so much confidence in them and their leadership.

I feel like I didn’t know what solid research looked like until I was in graduate school.

That’s when I really began to understand how important it is to do your research.

Shallow research leads to shallow results.

You can’t lead from that kind of place.

I love what Albert Einstein said, “If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?”

In other words, research is the process of transitioning from not knowing what we’re doing to being confident in what we’re doing and the decisions we make.

Not to mention, when you’ve done your research, it not only builds your own confidence as a leader, but it also helps the ones you lead have confidence in you.

So, do your research.

Number seven.

#7 HAVE UNQUESTIONABLE INTEGRITY

I recently did an entire episode on integrity.

Here's a link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5-wq1w6aQ4

I’m passionate about integrity.

Because I believe that integrity is the only right way to rise up into leadership, the only way to sustain exceptional leadership, and the only way to leave a lasting legacy as a leader.

Does that sound too dramatic?

Well, if you’re interested in hearing why, I encourage you to check out that episode next.

I’ll see you over there.

Keep fighting the good fight.